Tone Can Be More Important Than Words

How many times have you had an electronic conversation (such as email or some sort of online chat function) with someone and left somewhere between annoyed and pissed off?

OK, how about we break it down a little more? How many times have you had a conversation with a person who had a good point, but made the point in a way that flat pissed you off.

Raise your hand. OK. OK. OK. It's impossible for me to see with all of the hands I would imagine are in the air at this very moment.

Sometimes, we kick a certain type of etiquette clean to the curb like an NFL placekicker on most kickoffs.

This is where the smart ones among us are successful. They are successful where others fail because of their ability to deliver an effective message.

Your message will become pointless if you deliver it with a tone that is: angry, condescending, hypocritical, unnecessarily harsh, etc. Instead, phrase your message in a positive way -- even if you may be frustrated for one reason or another. It's impossible to read body language in an email. So, the non-verbals that are readable in conversation have little to no value.

So, keep that in mind.

BUT, if you absolutely have to be negative, frame it in a soft way. Don't come out blasting at the end of the electronic message. And, try not to end it with a negative. But, especially avoid beginning the email with hardcore negativity. Chances are, the rest of your message will be lost in the eyes, head and heart of a pissed-off reader.

A word to the wise (and, in some cases not so wise). When it doubt, take a soft approach. You'll win greater support than by being a jerk.